Tomorrow February 24th, is big for it marks the day my husband and I got married five years ago! We have planned a simple trip to San Francisco to celebrate. Simple trips always seems to go the best. I know when I go to plan big trips the stress is high with all the details that go into being away for a long time. My aunt is watching our lovely children as to whom I am hugely grateful! My husband and I can honestly say that we never get alone time and so this little vacation is much appreciated.
Considering we get no time alone you could conclude that we might argue all the time, but in fact it is the exact opposite. We have built a strong union through the years and when our kids are grown and beginning their lives as adults we will appreciate that alone time to travel and experience that much more. We have days where we are truly exhausted from work and raising children, we have days where we don’t know if we can make it through, and we have moments of complete frustration. We struggle, we strive, we learn.
As the years pass I learn more and more about the meaning of marriage. I have heard before that if you make it passed five years your marriage will last. I strongly disagree. Marriage isn’t something you put a timeline on, it is something that you continue to work at, to feed, to nurture, and to learn from. We have actually been together for nine years and married for five. During this time I have learned what is most important to keep a marriage going strong. Although I would love to say that I know it all when it comes to marriage, I really don’t. With each experience I learn something new and together we learn how to ride the bumps and come out onto a smooth surface. Our marriage doesn’t work because we are compatible, destined, or alike. It works because we make it work, we never leave, we never give up, we never accept less than what we want, we listen, we tell, we agree to disagree, and we do not sweat the small stuff. We are two very different people from two very different back grounds and we have to work to understand where the other one is coming from. I try to put myself in his shoes as he tries to do the same with me. Sometimes we say things we don’t mean and act out in a way to not be proud of but then we realise it, address it, and move on. I was on Facebook this morning and someone posted an interesting but very true post. It read “The grass isn’t greener on the other side. The grass is greener where you water it.” It couldn’t have been said better and I try to live my marriage by that notion.
I titled this blog “In Love & War”. This is the engraving I have on my wedding ring. When I engraved my ring with that saying I had thought it was a cute saying. I didn’t realise that marriage is really based on that fact. You will have love and you will have war, there is no denying that. The key is to getting through it and always learning from it. I can’t foresee the future by any means so I can’t promise I know how this all ends. I can say that I have a lot of faith in our relationship and that based on the past the future looks very promising.
So, to five years married and nine years together I give thanks to my husband whom means the world to me. Although not a huge milestone, it is a milestone I am proud of. I look forward to our every tomorrow, our new experiences, and our never forgotten memories. I am thankful to you for being such a wonderful father, a hard worker, and a loving husband. I appreciate everything you do and everything that you are. You have imprinted me in every way possible, you are my best friend, and my true confidant. Happy Anniversary Honey!